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  • Writer's pictureMadison Neumann

Wedding Tips for Introverted Couples

Your wedding day can command a lot of focus on you and your partner, and that can be a lot of pressure if one or both of you are more introverted by nature. If the watchful eyes of guests as you say your vows or hours of social interaction have you feeling a bit nervous for the big day: don't fear! There are so many adjustments you can make to your wedding to improve your experience. After all, while wedding's usually prompt big events filled with guests, the most important thing is celebrating your love for one another. And when its all about you, you should be feeling your most comfortable.

Two brides stand with one another following their first look on their wedding day at 18 label studios Montclair, NJ

  1. Have a first look

First looks are an organized time for you and your partner to see eachother on your wedding day. This is often a few hours before your ceremony so you're able to take all of your formal photographs following your first look before your wedding ceremony starts. First looks are especially great for introverted couples because it allows you to see each other for the first time that day without the pressure of all of your guests watching. You can feel free to express all of your emotions and take a moment to work through your wedding day nerves together.

2. Do private vows together

Personal vows can be a sweet and personal way to share your love for your partner, but you might find more comfort sharing that love in private as opposed to a full audience. Personal vows can be shared at your first look. Or if you're opting against a first look, you can share them in a letter, say them back to back, or stand around a corner at your venue.

Bride and groom share their vows at their fall wedding ceremony at The Gain House in Basking Ridge, NJ

3. Do "easy" vows at your ceremony

Saying your vows will be the part of your wedding day where you are speaking in front of a crowd: keep them nice and simple! Sticking with traditional vows where you are repeating a few lines can be a lot easier than going the personal vow route. For an added touch of privacy, you can request the microphone stays with the officiant and is not turned toward you as you speak.

4. Limit the guest count at your ceremony (and even the full event!)

As we've mentioned, your ceremony can be the most intimate part of your day. If you are opting against a first look, it will be the first time you and your partner see each other. It will be when you share your vows, and share your first kiss. For this intimate part of your day, you can keep it an intimate affair. Opt for a smaller guest list for your ceremony and invite an extended guest list for the rest of the days wedding celebrations (cocktail hour, reception, etc) or keep the entire event limited to a small guest list!

Bride and Groom at Wedding Ceremony at Perona Farms NJ

5. Ditch the full wedding party

Wedding parties can be great, but the truth is they can become very overwhelming. Everyone has to get ready (often confined in one space), get dressed, get their photo taken, and everyone typically hangs out together between all of those things. If you have a limited social battery it can be depleted pretty quickly if surrounded by a group of people all day. Choosing not to have a wedding party allows you the opportunity to have a more peaceful wedding morning experience either getting ready alone or with a small select group of people. It also cuts down on the photos you need to take during the day, giving you the opportunity for more breaks and alone time with your partner.

6. Make time for breaks

One thing about wedding days: they can fly by so fast! Plan ahead for the possibility of getting overwhelmed by a busy wedding day timeline and factor in breaks. You may want to consider breaks after hectic parts of the day such as family formal photos and your ceremony. Some venues offer private cocktail hours for newlyweds if stepping away from the crowd and enjoying alone time after saying your vows sounds like something you'd enjoy.

Wedding ceremony Ramblewood country club Marlton NJ

7. Don't walk down the aisle alone

At a traditional wedding: one partner, typically the bride, walks down the aisle with her father while the groom walks down alone. In 2023, wedding traditions are being left behind and walking down the aisle alone is one of them! I've seen both partners walk with their parents, their friends, their kids, their pets, and even each other! It takes the pressure off of walking down the aisle alone.

8. Don't do big announcements at your reception

We've all seen the grand announcements of the brand new couple entering their reception space, typically followed by cheering and dancing. If getting announced isn't your thing: skip it altogether! You can enter your reception with the rest of your guests and take your place at your seats or on the dance floor without all of the attention.

9. Skip the speeches

Speeches can be removed from reception plans entirely or moved to other smaller events like showers and rehearsal dinners.

Wedding reception first dance with bride and groom under tent at summer wedding

10. Shorten your formal dances

3, 4, even 5 minutes can feel like an eternity when your guests are watching you on the dance floor. Your music provider can help you with creating shortened versions of your favorite songs. I recommend keeping it to about 90 seconds or less!

11. Be mindful of reception seating

Depending on the type of introvert you are, you'll want to keep that in mind when selecting your reception seating. If being alone at a table with your partner without the lingering conversations of others sounds like a good time, opt for a sweetheart table. But, if the attention of being the only two at your sweetheart table, typically set as the focal point of your reception room sounds scary to you opt for a head table. At a head table, you can blend in with the crowd of your closest family and friends.

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